Holding On

Jake asked me Monday night if I could help him rearrange the attic so he could check our air ducts for leaks. I happily agreed because we have just continued to pile things up there to get them out of the way and I was hoping this would also be a chance to organize and purge.

When we started moving stuff I decided that it was time to finally go through all of Addy's clothes instead of allowing them to sit year after year in the attic. 6 years worth of clothes ended up living in 14 Rubbermaid totes packed to the brim. It was unreal!

I started sorting through them with the intention of donating, passing on to cousins, selling and keeping special outfits. I didn't really realize, though, how hard it would be. Seeing all these tiny outfits that I used to hold her in when she was a baby. And dresses that she used to wear while running around the backyard, and tiny little boots and her first day of preschool outfit. It was just very emotional.

When she got home from school today, I wanted to scoop her up and never let go. I don't want her to be that little girl again, but I don't want her to grow up so quickly either. It was a fresh reminder to be thankful for what God has blessed me with today. In this moment. I have had the privilege of watching my tiny little baby grow into a beautiful, kind-hearted little girl and I am thankful.

Yes, those tubs hold memories, but tonight, I'll get to watch her sleep and be reminded all over again of how special this moment truly is.



*** and no, Jake, not like the creepy mom in your favorite children's book I'll Love you Forever